Our 37th Spot:

Jade Chocolates

607 Grant Avenue San Francisco, CA 94108

www.jadechocolates.com

“I didn’t even know there are that many places to have Afternoon Tea in the Bay Area!?”

“How do you find all these Spots??”

“Don’t worry about it.”

When I heard there was Afternoon Tea being served in a chocolate shop, you better believe I was intrigued!! Now let me back up and explain (especially for our new followers): Our official Spots are numbered, but our raTEAngs include all official Spots AND unofficial Tea Room visits. So if you’re noticing that our numbers are kinda off, this is why. But to complicate things even more for you (tada!), this Spot we were supposed to visit in October. HOWEVER, while looking up how to make reservations, I accidentally saw something that caught my eye and I couldn’t unsee…and didn’t want to unsee haha!

The word was: Hawaiian.

Really really quick Story Time: My maternal grandmother is Hawaiian. But when I was growing up, I was never allowed to claim my Hawaiian roots as my abusive bio mom never wanted me to have any extra attention. I am in fact Hawaiian, my DNA says so. When I entered trauma recovery at the end of 2018, while doing my inner child work, I finally got to embrace my heritage and immerse myself + my family in it. It was poi + lomi salmon all day err day. I decorated my bedroom walls with pieces from local Hawaiian artists like: Colleen Wilcox, Mayan Llanera, Kat Reeder, Aloha de Mele, and Punky Aloha. And a whole lot more stuff that I’m not gonna get into here.

Needless to say, when I saw that word related to Afternoon Tea, it was all over! I was going. Then I read further, and found out it was only being offered til September 4th!? AAHHHH!! But I have to gooo! My schedule was packed as it is…I already had a Tea Spot scheduled for August AND a leisure Tea with my brothers the weekend before the 4th. (WHINE) I made it happen and I was going to go before they stopped offering the Hawaiian Tea. YAYYY!!!

So back to those questions in the beginning of this post… I’ve heard them both plenty of times. And no, I’m not going to share my secrets! (sticking out tongue emoji) All you need to know is I AM A DETECTIVE. (wink wink) And if you haven’t subscribed yet, keep following cuz you are in for mooorrrrreeee!!

It was cute + quaint. (I don’t know, “quaint” is the first word that came to mind so I’m going with it). There was one gentleman in there and he took us to our table. Fuuun, we got the window seat and were able to check out the City’s sights + people-watch. (apparently, I’m gonna whine this entire blog post) Because it was an impromptu squeeze-in Tour visit, after asking a few chocolate-lovers I knew but couldn’t make it, my husband made mention that he was interested. “I should just go with you to all the rest of them,” he says! Haha. Seems this one had such a good time at Maison, he wanted to accompany me for the rest of the Tour! What a cutie guy. So this would be our 3rd time at Tea, just the two of us! He is my biggest cheerleader.

Funny- I was trying so hard to get pics of our table without people in the background, but ended up using this one anyway! It’s just so real!!

Shortly after we were seated, our server brought out their Coconut Paradise Green Tea. If you remember, I don’t read anything (if I can help it) about Tea Spots before I go. I don’t follow them on socials, I don’t peruse their website. So this was a nice + welcome surprise: that we didn’t have to pick a tea today. One (for now) was selected for us. Oh man it smelled so creamy!! Yall know, I love me a creamy tea. Creamy coconut guys, creamy coconut. Can you just imagine!? I took my first sip, and it was good! Oh. It had sweetener in it. Not my favorite. As a tea maker/creator/gourmet tea boutique drinker, I prefer the highest quality of teas and never doctor up my cuppa’s. But that’s my preference… Still, we enjoyed our tea and the perfect music that was playing and so on-theme!!

The tier came with the owner. I only knew her name, thanks to one of my Foodie friends on IG who had recently visited (Hi Tim!). She said our server would be right back. And after the tier was set down, he started. He had a full-on history lesson on the Hawaiian Paniolo (Cowboy) themed tea!! SO COOL. He really got into it and knew his stuff. Excellent entertainment for tourists that visit Chinatown (which is where this place is located).

After his story, he explained what each item was on the tier. Thankfully we didn’t have to memorize everything this time, as there was a menu with it all listed left on the table. I’m admitting it- I was totally judging everything I was looking at. “I don’t like this.” “I don’t like that.” “I’m not gonna eat this.” I’m not a fan of salads on tea services. I was looking at these sandwiches, and there was nothing cutesy about it. (sigh) I brought down the plate of salad and started taking my pictures…

Parker Ranch Salad (mango, papaya, kale, & edamame in a spicy sesame vinaigrette, cassava chip topper) – (sigh) At least I like papaya… I took my first bite. (chewing on the hard kale) I don’t even like kale that much… Then, I found myself taking more + more bites. Oh man. This is really good! (I was being such a brat huh?!) The dressing wasn’t too spicy, it just brought a nice mild kick. The fruits were the juiciest fruits! I loved the texture from the soy beans. And that cassava chip, just went perfect with everything. The only negative was the size of the plate. I had to actively hold each leaf from falling off every time I forked it. But no biggie.

Vaqueros Vegetarian Chile Verde Chili – I can’t say I’ve ever had chili on a tea service. But since I was so wrong about the salad, I was getting excited now! I’m not even supposed to have beans…but, I tried it anyway. (see the things I do for you guys!) Ugh, again, so so good! We love quinoa in the house, so that was a familiar bite. It was so fun and such a nice surprise addition!

Grilled Cheese with Caramelized Sweet Onions – I was on a roll now, bring it on sister! Again, not supposed to have yellow cheese nor onions. (hahah!) That sandwich was GRILLED TO PERFECTION. Excellent combo. Simple but done right. (oh man, I wish I had one right now)

King’s Hawaiian Bread with BBQ Beef Brisket – Okay so, I grew up with King’s. My gramma would get the round loaf that came in like a pie tin, and we would just grab handfuls when we wanted some! (haha, funny thinking about that now) I don’t know what their chef does with these, but I only now noticed that it said “King’s” on their menu while reading for this part of the post. That joint tasted homemade boyyy! Oh and the meat. They used fattie hearty pieces of meat. Had to get a good bite in there, but still was so good.

Paniolo Pineapple Cornbread, Honey Butter – The last thing to try on this tier was their cornbread. Super moist, not too dense, perfect consistency.

And after having all this gorgeous food, I understood why the coconut green was sweetened. It matched good with the savory profiles. Which by the way, the Huz finished the pot!

Paniolo Palate Cleanser (passion fruit, orange, guava shooter) – I wanna say this is only the 2nd tea service we’ve had with a palate cleanser. The one I can remember was from Linde Lane in Dixon. Maybe the hotels might’ve had one… Anyhow, this was so good! Of course, I could be partial cuz this is my absolute favorite flavor of juice. When I was a kid, I would collect the plastic half cups of them (you know, with the foil pull-back lid) from the plane rides! My favorite Hawaiian Sun? Pass-O-Guava, what else?! This was like a slushie version of that, plus just a little more tartness. Oh, personal annoyance (to whoever’s listening): please oh please don’t call it POG!!

Before the next tier (we get 2 tiers!? Yayyy), they brought out their 2nd pairing of tea: a Lychee Guava White. Um, YUM. I was already excited just hearing the name! I love me a lychee tea!! It was very fragrant, didn’t seem like this one was sweetened, and full of flavor. I was a big fan.

With the delivery of the Sweets Tier (I gasped btw, so pretty), came the conclusion of the history experience. He did such a good job! (clapping emoji)

Liliko’i Marshmallow S’more – I didn’t read the menu before I put this in my mouth. Looks like a s’more, must be a s’more right? Just so we’re all clear: I am a LILIKOI FREAK. I love Lilikoi anything! All-time favorite dessert: La Costanera‘s lilikoi panna cotta. Favorite sweet: Cookie Corner’s lilikoi fruit bar. Favorite art piece by Punky Aloha (that I have an 18×24 of in my living room): Lilikoi. I think you guys get it. So when I tasted it and then subsequently confirmed it on the menu- I clapped my hands and did a happy dance! You guys (the I can’t even emoji), it was so good I wanna cryyyyy!! And the first time chocolate was in the tea service!? Amazing, perfectly roasted marshmallow, excellent chocolate, crunchy not soggy cracker.

Caramelized Tropical Fruit Skewer (pineapple, strawberry, sweet potato) – This was so much fun!! I loved crunching the bruleed sugar! That sweet potato was a nice addition.

Macadamia Brown Butter Blondie – This was nice + light. Strawberries on the side were refreshing.

Okay yall- I was pleasantly surprised at this Tea. It wasn’t even all chocolate-infused! My sincere apologies to the owner + chef that I ever doubted what was being served. Yall know what you’re doing over there. From the music to the tea pairings to the…banana leaf that the skewer was served on!! From my understanding, themes change often. So I am looking forward to coming back fo sho! Readers/Followers, please go and visit them!! You will not be sorry, I promise. A Hawaiian-themed tea service, are you kidding me!!?! I am sooo HAPPY I finagled fitting it on the Tour!! If anyone is out there doing an Italian-themed Tea, hit me up! (haha, my paternal grandfather was Italian)

I ate my leftovers at home and was so sad I had no lilikoi marshmallow to wash it all down, wahh…

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Our 35th Spot:

Proper Hotel/Villon Restaurant

1100 Market Street San Francisco, CA 94102

www.properhotel.com

I don’t have a picture of the building or sign of the hotel/restaurant, cuz (1) I don’t bring my camera out when I probably shouldn’t and (2) it was a whole voyage to get there! Haha.

Learning from our Maison visit, I remembered to check the surrounding area of the Tea Spot beforehand. It suggests you park at this parking garage 4 blocks away. Yeah, we’re not doing that. Thankfully, we found one 2 blocks away (go to the one on Golden Gate yall) tho we did still have to walk through the pee-pee infested air and a handful of homeless sleeping on sidewalk and druggies getting their high right in front of us. (Again, my apologies Ladies!!) I had the most adorable group with me this time. A pair of Besties and my husband’s honorary Big Sister (which makes her my “Big SIL”), so much fun with them let me tell you!

We finally get seated at this cute little setup, catch our breaths (no more urine pollution), and take in our surroundings. Ugh, mad eclectic in there! So much random art and diverse interior design. There wasn’t really a rhyme to its reason, and I appreciated it cuz it all still worked somehow!? Just look…

It was the Besties’ first Afternoon Tea, so we celebrated that! We all talked about what teas to choose for our service. Only 9 teas to choose from, and in my experience, not usual ones you see on a tea menu. Sometimes that’s exciting…so you get to try new stuff right. But other times, especially when the blends are more out there, you kinda feel like slim pickin’s. This time, I felt like I wish I had more choices… The table ordered their Copper Leaf Black (honey-malt-longan fruit), Emperor’s Flower Oolong (noyaux-jasmine-pine nut), and Chai Assam Black (rich-spicy-sweet). I was a Bad Tea Reviewer cuz I only had mine. (cheesy emoji) ALTHOUGH, I was listening to the comments of my girls and they did like theirs! I heard the chai was a hit. Mine, (the Copper Leaf) eh. It smelled more promising than it was. Comforting, earthy, brown ricey scent. But it fell flat for me, nothing to it. Could you believe I only had the one pour?! The rest of the time, I was drinking my water.

I did like that they give you the option to change out for another blend, tho. I like when Tea Spots allow you to do that.

Not soon after, here came someone with a PLATE of food. “Huh? Oh! Do we get Welcome Appetizers?! My favorite!” is what I was thinking. Let me back up and mention that we walked into the tea area, seeing this gorgeous group of girls in their fascinators and like THREE TOWERS on their table!! Where were our towers?? (sad cringey emoji) Then he set down this plate, and oh. It was our sandwiches. Raise your hand if you know how I feel about tea party food all on one plate? For those that don’t, click here. And here. Remember in F.R.I.E.N.D.S. (I always have to put the dots!) when Joey screams, “Joey doesn’t share food!!”? Here’s me: “I don’t like all my tea party food on just one plate!!”

So here’s your boring picture of all the tea sandwiches on one plate.

Again, they don’t have the items listed on the menu. Again, I couldn’t remember everything they said when they told us all of it. (hahah) And again, I’m not gonna have the official names listed on here. To be fair, we did ask him maybe 2-3 times what the sandwiches were… He was just so sweet + so soft spoken, we could barely hear! So I’m gonna do my best yall. But at least you’ll have picture reference. (Oh yeah, and where I was sitting the lighting wasn’t great…so these shots aren’t well, great. I did my best. Yall know I’m not a photographer!)

Cucumber Mascarpone – The lighter cheese is so different! You expect a creamier, more viscous situation right. The mascarpone wasn’t it for me. And their ratio was off. Too much cream. Doesn’t make for a cute sandwich either. [Check out the size comparison to the utensils beside my saucer. These sandwiches were the size of cutting a standard slice of bread in 4…like for four square!]

Goat Cheese, Arugula + Jam – Before I got to mine, I was already hearing that this was a table favorite. And my girls weren’t wrong! It only took one bite for me to know that I should set this one on the side, so I can save the best for last! (You were singing the song in your head huh? Yeah you were! I heard it!) This combo was bomb-dot-com. I don’t know if people are saying that still…but I’m sure you guys get tired of reading “SLAMMIN” from me. Gotta change it up on yall once in a while!

Spicy Egg Salad – They said this one was spicy, but none of us thought it was. Least favorite of the one-half of Besties that was sitting next to me. It was turmericy or curryish. I didn’t mind it tho! But the bread. I don’t know if these were toasted or left out for a while…but- not only was the bread nutty (so you had to fight to chew those), but it was also scratchy! For me, anyway. The other half of Besties that was sitting in front of me, says hers were all soft. So I’m glad she got good ones.

Smoked Salmon Crepe – I can remember the texture of this one just looking at it again, and it’s not a good feeling. (dry-heave) Our best guess was that these are crepe layers in between the salmon. And possibly a very thin layer of spreadable cheese. Light sprinkles of some sort of herb on the side, that didn’t make any kind of difference to the flavor. But this thing was SO SOGGY you guys!! Think: cold crepe and the thinnest salmon slices that were dipped in water! Yuckth. I don’t know how they managed to dilute the flavor of “smoked” salmon, but they did it alright. At one point I said, “Ugh, I don’t think I could finish this…” And my girl cut in and urged “Don’t do it!!” Hahah! She was looking out for me, thank you boo!

Yayyy we got towers!! That’s more like it. (humble emoji) I learned my lesson and started writing down as he was talking about what each of these were! I got most of it…hahaha.

Macaron – No, I didn’t get what flavor this one was. I’ve failed you already with the desserts! Something chocolatey with a hint of peanut butter maybe. Whatever it was, there was a surprising punch of flavor in the middle! So unexpected, but so welcomed!

Chocolate Cake – Soo soft cake. Nice bitter aftertaste. We think those were espresso beans on the top, crunchy + coffee-esque!

Rainbow Cake – This one had a nice almond extract flavor, but didn’t taste artificial (which I expected with all that food coloring). Really moist sponge, too.

Strawberry Basil Cake – Ooh, this dessert completely caught me off guard. I sliced it with their butter knife and put that slice in my mouth while someone was mid-sentence and- WOW. Delicious combination of strawberry jelly topping, strawberry mousse, and basil cake. I loved this!

Olive Oil Mascarpone Cake – I saved this bite for last, cuz I love olive oil stuff!! Not just cuz of my name…but I genuinely do! Salt & Straw makes this amazing olive oil ice cream!! The creamiest most flavorful thing ever. (my whole mouth just filled up with saliva typing about it) Boy was I sorry. It was dry. Not really a flavor to it. Bleh.

Plain Scone – I was asked recently if I like a plain scone or scones with stuff in it… I don’t mind a currant or berry once in a while. But I think my preference would be plain, so I can taste all of the presented fixings brought out with the service. I was hearing from the girls how sweet this scone was. And Ladies + Gentlemen: this was the first time I did not use anything for my scone!! A good sturdy scone (more like a biscuit) that was sweet enough, but not too sweet.

The service was good. We got these two really sweet + reserved servers. Even the host that sat us was quite mild. We were offered hot water often and checked on a reasonable amount. At the end when my girlfriend asked if she could bring home her fixings, they brought out huge containers of each in a bag for her.

One of my girls commented that she felt people were noticing us having a good time, cuz…well…we LAUGHED the entire time!! These girls are a hoot! We shared hearty laughter (the bent over, faces turning red kind) til our stomachs hurt. Cannot wait to Tea it up with them again.

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Our 34th Spot:

Maison Danel

1030 Polk Street San Francisco, CA 94109

http://www.maisondanel.com

This was a special visit, because I got to bring the Huz with me!! Of the 22 years we’ve been together, 12 of which I have been going to tea- this will only be our SECOND TIME! (read about our first visit here) So the anticipation for this Tea Date kept growing since I made the reservation.

We’re no strangers to driving into the City. We live about 45-minutes away, but we have a few eateries out here that we’re loyal to. I, as well, commuted into the City as a kid for 12 years with my family. Do we know the City well? Let’s say: we’re “familiar”. Tho as we drove deeper in and toward our location, things weren’t looking so great. Haha! Once again, let me just say right here that I don’t like to see anything about Tea Spots I’m going to visit in advance. I’m sure I’m repeating myself verbatim from a previous post, but- I won’t follow them on social media, I won’t look at the menu, I won’t look at pictures. I’m as clean of a slate as possible when I walk through their front door! All I knew about Maison Danel was from the one picture I accidentally saw that looked really fancy in there. Did I pay attention to the street it was on or location it was? Of course not! (rolling eyes emoji) So yes, we all of a sudden saw a bunch of trash and carts and yes, homeless. Now before I get political views in my comments or messages (also be nice or be blocked), I have nothing against the homeless community. As a matter of fact, my heart hurts when I see some. As a matter of fact, I grew up with a father who pretty much adopted a homeless man and gave him everything but the clothes off his back every night we saw him on the way home during our commute! My issue is: I have clinical OCD/Germaphobia. Like not “ohmygosh I’m so OCD heh heh heh”, but forreal diagnosed by a Dr OCD. So yes, being around homeless ones triggers a lot of my anxieties. I’m not (quote/unquote) scared either being around “rough” people. Don’t forget I’m from Richmond, CA.

I wanted to go home dood. HAHA! The deeper we got, the crazier it looked. And, I just was not in the mood to be brave that day!! Hahahah. I posted about it on Threads, follow us! @parteawithmeblog But, we had a reservation. AND, I was determined to review this place for yall. Um, yer WELCOME!! (sticking out tongue emoji) So after looking for parking for about 20-minutes, we THANKFULLY found a spot on the very next block. What? Oh there are no pictures of the building, you said? You’rrre right!! I wasn’t gonna pull out my DSLR for that! Yall get a picture of the menu!! (laughing crying emoji)

Okay. Whew! We’re in, we’re settled. I was so FRAZZLED you guys!! Here’s the best shots I got of inside…

Great selection of teas! I was impressed. So many good ones to choose from. I wanted to try at least 3 of em! I always try to get something different, but (and my longtime followers will know this one) something caught my eye that I couldn’t leave alone. They had a black vanilla yall!! So of course, I chose that one. The Huz was more adventurous than me, and took their Le Mont Blanc (a silver needle white with melon, honey and floral notes).

Vanilla Black – Smelled AMAZING! It was so nostalgic for me. First sip was light, needed to be steeped longer. I could tell there was something different about it…it had cinnamon!? Didn’t expect that. Even after a longer steep, it was still not as bold as I would like. But, still quite a good tea.

Le Mont Blanc – Oh the Huz loved his! He even got more hot water to refill his pot! He said he liked the moments of sweetness in there. When I tried it, I thought it was faint and perfumey. But I was happy for him!! [Also, photo cred: him. How cute is his picture of his tea!?]

Okay. (exhale) Here’s where things started getting hectic and funny over here. I’m sitting in front of a window- or wait, or should I say: there was a window behind me. So, I was getting a lot of sunlight. It was so tricky to get these next shots coming up. But the tier. Oh that tier! Let me set this up for you guys… I was frazzled. I already mentioned that. From the germs, the parking, all of it. And even after 22 years, I still wanted to be cute for my husband. We don’t have regularly scheduled dates, so when we do go on them- we make it count! I was very aware who I was with that day!! I know his mannerisms. I could tell when his breathing pattern changes mmkay! And it’s not like he was having a bad time or anything. I was just in anticipation for it, or concerned about it, or just aware. This was also a ‘Working Tea’, which he knew and didn’t mind. Actually, that part was his favorite. Since taking my family to Muir’s, he’s been wanting to see me work again. I was given some tips from the lovely Boozie Brunch (follow her here!) on how to make better Reels, so I was excited to try them out. I don’t know how to make Reels yall. And that’s where it’s at on socials, so I better get better. But the Huz and I were CRAC-KING UP on my attempts at filming these things!! The frazzle-ness, the ‘wanting to be cute’, the experimental Reels filming…and oh yeah, this was the first time I was posting real time thoughts on Threads! All of it was just a lot. (awkward funny face emoji) But we were still enjoying our time!

You know how when they bring the tiers out and they start naming what each item is? And you know how I never pay attention cuz I’m already overwhelmed with how pretty everything is and I’m already anxious about getting my shots + videos before all my friends starve? But it’s okay cuz I take pictures of the menu so I’ll know what everything is later when I do my reviews anyway. WELL. The stuff isn’t on their menu! Hahaha. I don’t have the official names, but I’ll do my best at describing them. Hey, at least you’ll have my picture to go off of!

Cucumber + Egg Sandwich – I didn’t like the burnt scratchy toast, needed salt, and it jacked up the roof of my mouth for the rest of my meal.

Smoked Salmon Croissant – Sooo good! We think it was creme fraiche inside…I coulda had more of that. But the pastry was perfect. [Btw, I’ve been meaning to clarify something cuz it’s been bothering my conscience…and I’m gonna take this opportunity here to do that! When I visited the St. Regis, I said that I had never had caviar before. But I was reminded that I in fact DID have caviar before then, while visiting the Palace. Whew! I’m so glad I got that out!!]

Ham + Cheese Croissant – Don’t ask me what kind of cheese, cuz I didn’t listen member? All I know was it was a juicy, squishy, white cheese (that I probably wasn’t supposed to have, cuz I’m lactose sensitive), and I couldn’t have enough of it. Unexpected punch of flavor. That crunch from the toasted pastry was beautiful! Wasn’t too salty either. I just kept saying “mmohmygosh” after every bite…

Custard Croissant – Very simply good. Reminded me of egg pie.

Madeleine – When the Huz took a bite of his, he says to me “oh you’re gonna love this one!” At my first bite- it’s LILIKOI!! (three clapping hands emjois) I love anything passion fruit, absolute fave. This was no different. Not too strong. My favorite thing from the tier!

Macaron – Again with the surprises!? This was so shockingly good. Very fluffy shell, and just as fluffy filling. (we think it was raspberry) So light + airy. Was not expecting how much I would adore this one. 2nd favorite for sure.

Almond Cookie – There was a bite to it, kinda chewy.

Cake – Reeally should’ve listened when she was talking about this one. Especially cuz there was some sauces on the side, and we weren’t sure what to put them on!? I thought she said ‘carrot’, the Huz thought something else. I only took a bite, but he loved this one!

Cranberry Twist – So fun! Nice crunch, cranberry bits in there, the custard was really good.

Remember when Phoebe was offered some salt water taffy? What the mother of crap is up with this stuff?? . . . Oh it’s nice, may I try a pink one? That’s how the Huz described me while I was trying these! Hahah. I wasn’t sure about them at first. And then I liked it! Ha!

Lemon – I’m not a fan of lemon stuff, but the cake was good.

Raspberry – Started off tasting like air freshener, but the aftertaste was nice. Lol.

Apricot – The little bit of chocolate in there made this one.

Milk Chocolate – Classic caramel, good.

Dark Chocolate – Marshmallow was fun. A little more bitter than I like. But the Huz said it was a good finisher.

All in all, it was a great tea service! You can def tell it was a patisserie where the bread SHINES. Lots of food, really good portions, worth what it cost. Would I come back? Hm. If someone dropped me off at the front door and I didn’t have to walk through what I had to walk through to get there, then YES! Customer service was good. We even got a server with a delicious French accent! Place was really clean, bathroom was gorgeous.

Having my husband there was too much fun. We were Best Friends to begin with, before we became anything intimate. Two abused kids who found safety in each other. Got married way too early. Made a life together, had a couple kids. Had to figure out how to be ‘husband’ and ‘wife’. We have been th-rough it okaaay!! And after healing and meeting oursleves, we just laugh and laugh and laugh. Like the Best Friends we started off as. I still have a crush on him. He still gives me butterflies. I still look at him like when he was my boyfriend! And I will never forget how he looked when he opened the truck door for me that afternoon before we left for home. Love you Poppi, my Samoan Love.

But before I finish this post, a little Story Time… Next to us, there were 3 Cutie Girls. They just looked like they were having a grand ol’ time! Because I’m the friendly girl that talks to everyone that I am, I had to comment on their cuteness! We finished around the same time, and I had to ask if this was their first time. We got to know each other and switched Instagram handles. How cute are they!? They are all Calligraphists!! (three open mouth emojis) What cool jobs! Check out their socials here: @blanca_lewis_calligraphy @alcove_calligraphy @wildflowerlettering We all follow each other and get to know each other a little bit more… Come to find out- 2 of them have family in common with us!!! Too too sweet. We’ll definitely be having tea together in the future, so stay tuned for that!!

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Our 32nd Spot:

Son & Garden

535 Bryant Street Palo Alto, CA 94301

www.sonandgarden.com

[Again, my Spots are not misnumbered. Read our last Blog Post for full explanation.]

Since I had an unexpected hospitalization, I had to reschedule this Tea from last month. All over the confirmation emails, it says “nonrefundable” or “cannot be modified”…so I thought I was gonna have a hard time. Thankfully, the owner or manager I spoke with was so kind about the whole thing. It was easy to change my reservation, and she even understood me well all through my labored speaking voice.

You can see ALL THOSE FLOWERS from the sidewalk. I got there before my girls, and checked us in…taking all the hundreds of florals in. I could hear Miley in my head! Smaller venue than what I expected. I don’t know why or how these instagram posts or TikToks make these places look more massive and luxurious than they actually are…? Hashtag, click-bait…or wait, visit-bait! 😛

I’m so glad we made it in time for their Cherry Blossom Tea Service. Even tho I didn’t specifically know what it entailed, I just love that whole vibe. My daughter is big into cherry blossoms. Sometimes I call her “Sakura” and she answers to it! Hehe. We did that in Japantown once, and people kept looking at us as if in awe that we picked that for her name!! Her actual middle name IS in Japanese, chosen by my husband (who is infatuated with the culture).

Soon after our party was seated, they brought over their Welcome Drink: Spring Time (Japanese Sakura Flower, Fruity & Floral, Lemon, Bubbly Water). I only had a sip. It was pretty tho, came in a cute square glass cup, had 1 blossom floating around…very aesthetic. It was nice, sweet. And I love Welcome Stuff!! Have you ever watched that Vacation show on Netflix?! Every time they got to a new rental, they had Arrival Appetizers waiting on the counter for them! I was fascinated. I love Arrival Appetizers!! (can you tell?)

I had this place Pinned on a Board for a while. Looked really cute, had this funky appeal. Happy to’ve added it on the Tour, of course! Then I saw this ad or post somewhere of something called a “Bobamosa”. Looked so cool and the promo was so eye-catching! My Assistant (I don’t really have one, that’s just my gf’s nickname hehe) loves boba, so I showed her. Of course she’d be invited to this Tea. And of course she ordered it! We saw all these cool drinks coming out, with moss all over them and branches sticking out! Those weren’t her’s tho. Oh, here her’s came. Oh. She said it was just okay… Fully champagne (no juice involved) with strawberry popping boba. Here’s the promo, and here’s what she got… Not our first Instagram vs. Reality moment with this Spot.

You saw the table we were working with right? No tiers at this place. No, this Tea Spot presented their tea party food on CARTS!! Ugh, could you just die at all this floral cuteness!!?! I can’t. I couldn’t, then. We took all the videos + pictures + boomerangs we could! I joked with our table, “we can eat in about ten minutes!” Haha. Oh! I forgot to mention who I brought with me!? Okay, so- my Assistant (the boba-lover), and 2 dear dear friends (mother + daughter, but their relationship is so sweet they could be Besties!) that I’ve wanted to hang out with for a while now. Mom + sweet girl have never been to Tea, so Firsties!! (jazz hands emoji) So, they bring TWO of these carts out AND 2 medium size plates of scones + pastries. Where are we supposed to put all this stuff?? We manage to find room…but I could barely see my friend!? Haha. I have to like duck or reach over flowers, if I want to have any kind of communication with her!

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Matcha Scone – These were the most gorgeous looking scones I’ve ever seen at a tea service! A beautiful shade of green, if I do say so myself. And they came out warm! (I love having warm fresh scones!!) Took my first bite…oh. So dry + crumbly! And really lacked flavor. Someone from our table said they “tasted like burnt matcha”. Yikes. I went to wash it down with my t- hold on, I don’t have tea?? Isn’t this a TEA party?! Let me back up- first of all (ooh, you know it’s bad when someone starts with those 3 words huh), if you scroll up a bit you can see a little leaf thing sticking out our teacups. They had a TEABAG sitting in the cup. I wanna say I was introduced to this brand at the last SF Tea Fest I went to…or maybe it was a sample that was sent to me. But I don’t think I was very impressed, or I would have remembered. So it was just that one tea type. And it was just sitting there.

In the cup.

Looking at me,

choking on my dry burnt matcha scone. Haha!

Dood! We were well into passed a half an hour of our tea service with no tea man!? Come on! I had to request water for it. Now I’ve had Cherry Blossom teas before (oh yeah, that was the flavor of this tea…surprise!) The St. Regis serves a really good one, but my favorite and a staple at home is Harney & Sons. This one was just full on cherry flavor. Not much to it.

Okay (sigh), for the rest of this tea service I’m gonna go relatively fast. There’s a lot of items they served, but not really much to say about any of em…unfortunately. This is verbatim what I wrote in my phone about each of these… You’ll see what I mean at the end of this post. Just wait for it.

Ham & Cheese Danish – dry + crispy

Cucumber + Dill Sandwich – crunchy cucumbers, didn’t like the cream

Egg Salad + Chive Sandwich – nice, comforting, needs salt (tho one person at our table didn’t think so 😉 )

Salmon + Cream Cheese + Dill – LOTS of it (let me expand on this… the ratio was not good, salmon was overpowering); this was a favorite of one of my girls however, so it was nice to see her enjoying it! OH! And we had fun with that edible butterfly! “It’s EDIBLE you know!!”

There were ELEVEN sweet things to their FIVE savory things. Here we go…

Raspberry Sorbet – very sweet, someone said it reminded them of “Jamba Juice”; I thought this was more of a cutesy thing

Orange Blossom Honey Madeleine – dense but nice flavor, like the frosting thing on top

Lemon Tart – nice pastry, a little too much lemon for me, artificial lemon

Chocolate Raspberry Tart – artificial flavors

Macaron – this was the only thing I liked, I think it was vanilla

Assorted Petite Pastries – [round] dry, crumbly, bland; [square] had fun crispies

Opera Cake – good, coffee

Whew! We’re done, we made it. There was just so much to try. I forgot to mention on the onset just how overwhelmed we were in the beginning. They packed those carts so full. And you would think that was a good thing, but most of the items lacked quality in flavor. Everything was more “CUTE” than good. There were quite a few pieces my friends didn’t even get to. And no one really wanted to take anything home either. I reluctantly did, cuz I don’t like to waste. I literally just took ONE BITE out of each thing just so I could write about it. I mean, look!! Evidence!

Overall, this Spot is more of a ‘trendy’ ‘instagram’ ‘tiktok’ place to me. I mean, one of their corners even has a neon sign and a ring light!!? (monkey closing eyes emoji) Food was mediocre. Service was good. If you ask me (this is where my husband would start on his spiel about Tea Houses and Tea Rooms needing to hire me as a Tea Consultant!!), I would cut down on your offerings and just focus on maybe 7 or 8 really GOOD things. They fall into the category of having a tea service just to have a tea service, if you know what I mean. Oh that’s another thing- they only offer it on weekdays and last seating is at 1p/1:30p. (eh emoji) For the price we paid, I expected more… My takeaway: I’m glad I got to spend time with my girls! Can’t wait to take them to a better one next time.

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Our 33rd Spot:

Malaya Tea Room

920 Central Avenue Alameda, CA 94501

malayatearoom.com

No, it’s not a typo and no, I didn’t miscount our Spot order. For those not following us on Instagram, I post on there almost every day…with updates too, like I was in the hospital last month. (so follow us!!) Soo, we had to reschedule our Spot #32 aand it happened to fit in our calendar only after this month’s Tea. Now that that’s all squared away, let’s get to the reason you clicked on this blog post!

I was happy to have found this spot when I was researching new afternoon tea places to visit for this Leg. Looked very quaint and I was attracted to that. What struck me first was the name “Malaya”. I grew up with a Filipino cousin named Malaya… Was this place Islandy…? You all already know by now that I don’t like to look at pictures or websites or menus before I visit. I didn’t even follow them on social media yet, tho I was so curious!? Not only do I love the element of surprise, BUT I aaalways want to come to a place with a clear + open mind.

There were 5 of us. I asked 4 new friends to come (2 were mother + daughter). Explained that part of the parTEA with me Tour experience was the ride over! Oh that ride. We all had laughed so hard! Such a blast with these girls. Appreciating the neighborhoods filled with Alameda’s Victorian homes and listening to relaxing/vibey tunes… Just made the excitement + anticipation for this spot way more enjoyable.

When Malaya called me to confirm our reservation, I didn’t know there was an option to eat outside. And whooo loves to eat outsiiiide?! Meee! Yayyy! (see what this does to me)

Aside from the cars parked right behind us…look how CUTE!! Upon seating, one of the staff saw my friend helping Mom at the head of our table and he swiftly grabbed a more comfortable chair for her to sit. Already scoring points with me, Malaya! And the interior was just as darling. Even the bathroom was stunning. (don’t worry, I didn’t bring my camera in there)

They had a unique menu. ‘British Flavors’ and “Malaya Flavors’. They had classic English tea party foods, like the cucumber and smoked salmon. Then all these really cool Malaysian ones! Five from each. And, we were able to choose 2 sandwich flavors for each tea service. Mom got her own special two, and the 4 of us (because we’re smart!) got one of each kind!! (only minus 1 flavor from each category) We wanted to try everything, cuz they all sounded so good + intriguing. (I’m sure you’re tired of me using that word at least once in each blog post to describe some food item or tea, I’m tired of it myself! But oftentimes that’s really the only way to describe it!)

[photo credit to my girl sitting in front of me for this one!]

They took our tea orders first. LOTS to choose from. Let me count- okay, 33 of em. At our table, we got:

Malaya’s Signature Golden Monkey – “Creamy, strong, a little sweet, and nice,” says my funniest friend there.

Citrus Oolong – Mom says “it reminds me of my favorite Chinese restaurant!”

Jasmine Silver Tip – My feisty girlfriend says this one was “just okay”…but she just needed to steep it a bit longer.

No. 14, with grapefruit and cocoa nibs – I’m so glad she ordered this one cuz I wanted to try it too! Says this one had a “very familiar taste” and kinda reminded her of Thai tea!

Paris Morning, smooth black tea with a hint of cherry – My choice! It was a toss up between this one and a butter + caramel one for me, so I took our server’s suggestion. Glad I did cuz it was a nice creamy tea (yall should know by now) with a mild tartness in the back. Very good!

I think I was expecting 2 small triangle sandwich pieces for each flavor, that we were gonna have to cut ourselves in two in order for the 4 of us to try…? So it’s an absolute understatement when I tell you that I was astonished when those tiers came out. THE CLASSIC FINGER SANDWICH AAHHH!!! I can’t remember for the life of me if any of the 31 other Tea Spots we’ve visited ever served them this way!? A lot of em try to do cute shapes and cut things or make things that are pretty…but not practically eatable. What comes to mind is: Exhibit A = Linde Lane‘s open-faced cucumber sandwich flower that I had to eat like a taco! (face palm emoji) And (sigh) there were 4 of each of them (sigh).

Cucumber with dill cream cheese – Again, yall know my routine by now…I went for the cucumber. Guys- so surpriiiised!? (mouth open emoji) I kind of expect the cucumber ones to be ordinary. Over 30 Tea Spots tried, and maybe just a handful of them have caught my attention enough to further examine what I am eating! Haha. This one had me do just that! An above average CLASSIC cucumber sandwich. And I don’t know why I was so shocked to taste the dill (cuz it says on the menu), but that was just such a welcome discovery hahah! Not all tea rooms take the time to add something extra to their cucumber. And Malaya is tellin yall to step up your game pee-pole!!

Smoked salmon with chive cream cheese – Of course. Lured to what I know, I grabbed the salmon next. And again with that bread!! I noticed it the first time but didn’t mention anything… That is some of the CHEWIEST bread everrr! (big eyes emoji) And yall know that’s my favorite. But this one was extremely noteworthy. Like, I was ready to ask for the brand or their baker’s phone number. Very good flavor and perfect ratio.

Turkey, brie & fig jam – Okay, it’s brie’s turn. Another really good sandwich. That’s 3 for 3 guys! I could have used a bit more of the fig butter (that’s just my preference), but such a good combo of flavors. Thumbs up!

[I was gonna try the last of the British flavors here, but the table told me to hold off. Tell you why later!]

My Seat Mate Date (hehe, the cutie girl sitting in front of me) (who by the way is totally hired cuz she remembered all the deats about each of the food items AND had excellent suggestions about my food shots!!) created these awesome “poses” of all the sandwiches in order of how they appeared on the menu THEN took photos of them with it! So cute right. And since these looked so sad by their lonesome, I copied her and made my own stack! (hey, I’m giving credit where its due)

By now I would have had a pile of half-eaten sandwiches somewhere, so I could move along and save room to try more stuff. But everything was gone. I was finishing all my sandwiches guys!? It was just the perfect portion. And they were all so amazing, I wanted every morsel of em!!

Meat Floss with basil spread – I’ve heard of meat floss before. And have seen it associated with Asian bakeries. And, that’s just what this tea sandwich reminded me of: a nice pork bun! Strange to think of it paired with “Italian” basil, so I’m thinking it was the Thai kind.

Malaysian style pork jerky with light mayo – “Lap cheong!” I can hear Yan Can Cook! That’s what this made me think of. It was a thick piece of meat, I wasn’t expecting that. But easy to bite down on and break off. You won’t be like taking your first bite and the whole thing has to come out! Don’t you hate that?

Again, I made a note here in my phone: “I don’t ever eat full sandwiches.” Cuz I was still in disbelief that I was eating everything I picked up…in full!!?!

Southeast asian style Curry chicken – (I’ve been writing all these food titles/names how they have them on their menu btw) It was sweet, didn’t expect that. I usually really like the curry ones, but this one was my least favorite so far. I think it was green oniony, that’s why. I still ate the whole thing tho. Hahah.

Coconut jam with sliced cold butter – Looking at this photo and calling to mind the words that I’m going to type about this tea sandwich…I wish I had some of these right now! So yummy!! Made me think of the butter + sugar sandwiches Daddy made me for breakfast, when I was a little girl. (in love emoji) Something about those butter slices man. Ugh. Such a good one!

And here’s those 4 cuties together!

Bittersweet marmalade with salted butter – Now for this one… No one at the table liked it, and my funny girlfriend said it killed her tastebuds. So that’s why she suggested I save it for last. Didn’t want the rest of my meal ruined… (Thanks gurlll!) I tried it. It was an overpowering bitter.

A savory canape – This was their savory treat included in the tea service. All that is potato! It’s a lot of potato. But nice kick at the end with that gooseberry! And of course I loved that cracker situation at the bottom.

Isn’t this dessert plate stunning?? Thanks again to my photoshoot assistant who brought the plate down for me from the tier so it could have its own moment! 🙂 Let’s get into it…

Now I don’t have the official names for these, and I cheated and looked off their social media (and the internet, thanks Google!) to learn more about this one! It’s a Kuih Lapis, an Indonesian treat! ‘Lapis’ means ‘layers’. It’s a steam rice + tapioca cake that you eat by layer. We didn’t know that tho. HAHA! While we were there. So, we just took bites of it! Still really fun to eat. Chewy texture. Reminded me a lot of a Filipino dessert called ‘kutsinta’!

This was a Pandan Cake. Nice light sponge, mild coconut flavor. I was getting so full after eating all those sandwiches, so I just took a bite or two of this one.

Black Sesame marshmallow and Rose marshmallow, I think. As small as these were, they still packed good flavor! (and yeas, I cut them in half so my Seat Mate could try too!) No solo pic of the rocks… But if you scroll a bit up, you can see them. They are chocolates! A nice little chocolatey bite when needed during your tea service!

MY SCONE!!!

I totally forgot about my scone.

I was so in love with the finger sandwiches, I completely skipped the scone dood!? I was hearing the table talk about how sweet the scone was, when I realized I hadn’t even had mine yet. I quickly put some fixings on my plate and took a few bites. A bit crumbly for my liking, and yes it was sweet. But not a bad scone.

Overall, I was THOROUGHLY impressed with this place. I always get nervous taking people to new tea houses, cuz I don’t want them to be disappointed if it’s bad. But I can’t say enough how much I loved this new tea Spot!! The customer service was terrific as well. Our server came out and talked with us, and paying was really convenient too. It was clean! Everything!! Nothing bad to say. I’ve been entering each new one in my updated raTEAngs list, and just so you know- Malaya Tea Room is up there. 😉 Already making plans to go back!

Malaya, if you’re reading this- I would pay more than what you are charging for this tea service. You are that good. #KnowYourWorth

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