I was supposed to go to Tea this Saturday (well actually, I was supposed to go to Tea 2 weeks ago… But my son had a gig, then we had an event… Yada yada yada). But since I’m not and I haven’t shared a post in a bit, I wanted to do an About The Author post for yall. I had an original topic I wanted to talk about, but then I saw this thing…and that made me change gears for this one. I’ll talk about that one another time!

A thread (from user @richrashann) said: “Social media tricked y’all into thinking that all hobbies need to be monetized. It’s okay to just enjoy things you like to do.”

This struck a chord with me so bad. I’ve talked a little bit about this before (on this post), how I have a knack for turning passions into jobs. But, I don’t think I ever got into really why. A supplemental income. It all started after I had my first child. My bio mom had said she would stay with me and help with the baby for 6 months. Except after 1, she left. I thankfully + hurriedly employed a close friend of ours to be our babysitter. Tho after a little bit, her sister got pregnant and she was needed for them. No childcare once again. It was NEVER in the plans for me to be a stay-at-home mom. I made that real clear to the Huz before we even ever conceived. ”Don’t think I’m gonna be those moms who stay home, cuz I love working too much okay!” But here we were- faced with this situation that needed a solution, and fast! It just didn’t make sense to me to work so hard, just to hand over my check to someone else. So, with an 8-month-old baby, the choice was made for me to be home with him. Reluctant at first, but then soon embraced this wonderful privilege.

We were making it work. My husband at the time was a Maintenance Manager for a property, so our unit came discounted. We’ve always chose a simplified lifestyle, so we never needed a lot of things. But I was hungry. Not for money (I actually hate money, really)…but for being useful. I wanted to contribute. I became the QUEEN of Side Hustles mmkaay!! I started my own business as a Financial Consultant. I have always been really good with money and very organized. I got us out of debt, helped family members move into their own homes, helped friends buy their first cars. WHY NOT get paid for doing that, right!? I was a representative for a multi-level marketing company. I sold baby products (like Tupperware, but with baby stuff). I was a Loan Officer for a real estate firm. I. Did. It. ALL mmkaay! While still raising my beautiful son, teaching him ABCs and keeping on top of laundry. 

It became ingrained, innate. Tho, like I mention in this post, I was very aware of the fact too- that once money is involved, it could turn into something no longer fun. That’s why that thread hit so hard. I love to sew right. Especially after having my daughter, I would make little things for her with onesies that she outgrew. Lots of hair bows + headbands. Someone insisted I get into business with them. I was unenthusiastic about it, but somehow agreed. Sewing was fun for me…when I chose to do it and was inspired. But now I was having to meet quotas and put my personal hobby out there for people to judge. It became a chore. And my daughter was no longer benefiting from it. I stopped it before it ever became a thing.

WHY AM I TALKING ABOUT THIS, you ask? Hehe. Especially when I have previously divulged that I decided to monetize this Blog?! Lol. I also touched on that in the “Website Milestones” post…but again, didn’t get too much into it. (sigh) Here goes. Something I’ve neeeever talked about on here. But felt since it’s unfortunately a big part of my life, that I’m going to use this platform + opportunity to be vulnerable and share my story.

I am legally disabled.

I have a cane and wheelchair when I need extra help, and even a handicap placard.

(exhale) Whew! There, I said it.

Over 5 years ago when I entered trauma recovery, my body and nervous system also reacted. It had taken medical professionals that long to diagnose me as well. After many tests and labs and Specialists and misdiagnoses, they finally know what’s going on. The cane isn’t new, I’ve had to use that before. The diagnosis came in April of last year. And the wheelchair (even tho I’ve needed it for longer, but just never asked) came in June. Boyyy, it has been a struggle. I am a young 42yo. I don’t know how to be in that wheelchair and feel like myself. I get my lashes done to feel “cute”. I always feel like I have to wear my coolest clothes. My girlfriend joked with me, asking if she should make me a sign for the back of it: “You know I’m from Richmond right?” Hahah.

What does this have to do with money? No, I’m not trying to pull at your heartstrings like they do in American Idol intros before the auditions to get you to donate to my website!! (ay-yay-yay) I’m telling my Readers about their Author! I’m sharing with yall that YES, I visit Tea Rooms + Tea Houses all over the Bay Area. And I do this only once a month (well, that’s what’s scheduled…I can’t help if more tea times pop up HAHA) because that’s what my body allows. The rest of the time I’m not at afternoon tea- I am home resting, recuperating, and taking preventative measures until my next outing. After all is said and done about not necessarily wanting to turn Loves into income- monetizing this Blog is what allows me to continue doing it. The modest amount that comes from ads and donations fund my Tea Trips, because I am unable to go out and have a traditional 9 to 5. Even tho I didn’t HAVE to explain this, I wanted to. I think it goes a long way in getting to know who you’re supporting. When you are ‘Like’ing posts, viewing + heart’ing Stories, commenting, reposting, clicking on my links, reading this blog, entering your email to subscribe to it, filling out that donation form, interacting with us on Threads, following us on Pinterest… YOU are allowing me to continue ENJOYING what I love to do, whether money is involved or not.

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